Introduction:
Have you ever had intrusive thoughts? What if you couldn’t control them and they turned you into a killer and did everything that went to your mind? Such is the story of Bruce where he played mind games because of his intrusive thoughts.
CHAPTER-1
Beginning
Bruce, a young lad going through his teenage years who has lost control of his own mind. He has lost the ability to control his thoughts, and his intrusive thoughts have gotten worse and worse.
Bruce was going through his teens, and he was put up with the task of selecting his major to pursue in his studies. He decided to go through with his decision to pursue business studies and decided to start his own business. He was about to decide, when he got a call from his teacher to talk about his future. He decides to go to his house, and they talk about his future.
Bruce tells his teacher that he wants to start his own business and make something of his own that’ll be remembered even after he is gone. But Bruce’s teacher told him on the contrary how business is ruled by monopolies, and you won’t be able to find your own place in the market and you’ll only destroy your future. He tells him he should pursue science to get a good paying job in order to get a secure future. Bruce tells his teacher that he has no interest in science, and he probably won’t be able to keep up with the higher studies. But his teacher convinces him that
” If you try hard enough, you can do anything. And if you truly want something in your life from the bottom of your heart, the whole world will get you to it. So just do your best and the rest is alright.” Feeling a bit reassured he returns home, but he was still confused.
He tells his father the whole story about what had happened, and his father tells him the same thing. ” What he’s saying is right, you shouldn’t risk your future. Just make sure you get a good paying job, and it’ll all turn out alright.”
He told the same thing to his father telling him that he doesn’t think he’ll be able to keep up with the studies. His father also tells him the same thing that it’s actually pretty easy to keep up with just trust me you got this.
So, Bruce thinks about it and thinks about his family, and he thinks ” I can’t put my family at risk, we’re already in some pretty bad conditions, and I’m my parent’s hope and I can’t put their old age in danger by risking my career”.
He finally decides to pursue science and decides he’ll do his best. And that’s the beginning of how he ruined his whole life. How he destroyed what could’ve been a very peaceful and lively future.
Afterwards, he was given the choice to go for private tutoring or going to the school to continue his studies. To which Bruce told them that he can study science, but he won’t be able to crack any competitive exams as he doesn’t want to put his life all into just studies, he wants to rather develop skills and put them to use. So, he doesn’t want to have private tutoring and just wants to continue school like he normally did. But his parents thought differently. They thought that without the proper teaching, there is no point in studying science. So, they decided to send him to some classes and just so he doesn’t feel like they’re going against him they’ll send him to school as well. Upon hearing this Bruce was shocked thinking about how he’ll manage everything.
He started his schooling and started going to school late due to the delay in the decision of him doing private tutoring or schooling, so he was behind on his syllabus. He couldn’t sleep at night thinking how he’ll be able to cover his syllabus on time. All he could think was how he’ll ever be able to study on his own. His day starts with going to school and after coming back he has to leave for his classes. When he comes back home, he has to do the work given in his school and his classes. He was slowly getting frustrated. His entire days were spent in just looking into books and thinking about his studies. He didn’t have any time to clear his mind and slowly his mind started getting filled with dark thoughts. He just constantly kept thinking about his studies and grades. He thought so much that at one point even when he was sleeping, he would just keep on thinking and instead of dreaming his mind will stay conscious speaking to him.
His exams came near and all he could think was how severely underprepared he was for his exams and as he thought he didn’t do well in his exams. And he scored averagely, but he had to tell his parents about his grades, and he decided to tell them even though he was really scared. He told them about it and what he saw just made him break his mind. He could visibly see the disappointment and disgust in his father’s face after hearing about his marks. He told him about how he was disappointed with him. He told him ” It doesn’t matter even if i give you everything you could ever need, you still won’t be able to do anything. All you can do is waste your time and waste your life away. I’m wasting my life earnings on you.”
Upon hearing this Bruce was very broken. He just kept thinking where he messed things up and how did he perform bad. After spending his morning thinking about that he left for school.
At his school, his teachers started asking him questions about his grades and exams telling him he should’ve studied better. Focus more on your studies than other things. And try to spend more time on your studies than other things. At this pace, your decision of taking sciences would have been a waste of your parents’ money. Which further broke him and made him regret his decision further. After coming back from school, he went to his classes and told his teachers they’re about his results which angered them and they told Bruce, ” You should work harder and actually try to make your parents proud. I don’t know what you’ve been doing with your time. But you have potential don’t waste it and don’t waste what your parents are doing for you.”
He went back home and when he went to sleep, he just laid down in bed and just kept thinking about how he’s wasting his life away. He felt like crying, but tears just weren’t coming down his eyes. He just felt everything was going wrong in his life and things have just been going down this endless spiral of despair. He just kept thinking and stayed up the entire night introspecting what led him to the situation that he is in right now. After thinking the entire night, he came to the conclusion that he can’t deal with all this anymore and needs some time for his own studies and handle some stuff on his own. He decides to leave his classes and put his time towards building his skills rather than wasting his time doing things he doesn’t like.
He started studying on his own and had more time for his own self and managed his time way better and tried his best to study. He studied his best and was getting better results. Towards the end of his school life, he started talking to this girl in his class, her name was Ms. Boo Blair, she was his sole source of happiness and the only place where he felt calm and relaxed. He started hitting it off with her and they soon fell in love with each other and started dating. Soon after he had his entrance exams and told his family ahead of time that he isn’t going to make the general exams, but he’ll pass the exam for his dream college. He gave both the exams and didn’t crack the general exam but managed to get into his dream college. But his father told him, ” I didn’t want to tell you this before and to be honest I just thought you wouldn’t make it. But I can’t admit you into that college because it is way too expensive. So, look for something else.”
After a little while he got his schooling results, and he got 88% in the exams. Upon telling his mother about the results, he found his mother utterly disappointed in his results. And his mother started to blame everything on his girl and just started to thrash their relationship. Telling him he got lost towards the end of his journey and things would’ve been much better if he only just focused more on his studies rather than on the girl. She told him to go tell his father about his result. He went and told his father about his result and upon hearing about his result his father looked very disgusted and whispered in himself, ” All of this money gone to waste, and I had such high hopes.” And he just went on his work without saying another word.
Upon seeing his father’s expression, he went into deep thought. He just kept thinking how he has disappointed everybody, and he’s wasted everyone’s money and hopes. He is a useless fellow who can’t seem to do what’s right and always mess everything up. He started having thoughts of death. He started thinking about how he should have stopped everything when he had the time. About how he’s ruined his career. And then suddenly he heard the voice in his head.